Akher Zaman

Do you know what’s funny? Il dunia sarat bil sha2loob…  

These days the girls are the ones that go after guys… yes its true..

I heard once that a girl once saw a good looking guy driving in his car and decided to follow him… she “dawatlo” and kept following him until he reached his house and then she got out of her car walked down to him and gave him her mobile number.. can you imagine that????!!  

I am not against the girl doing the first move but it is called the first move for a reason, it means open up the door to the guy, giving him the green light, not going all the way through..  

Call me old fashioned but I do believe that guys are the ones that should be going after girls, and I do believe this is more fun for both the girls and the guys.. guys like the chasing game and girls like to be chased..  

And you want to know what else is funny? Nowadays when a guy and a girl start going out together and people start talking about it the guy is the one that gets paranoid and decides on ending the relationship..  zaman the girl used to try her best hiding her relationship for no one to know especially not her family and the guy wanted to tell everyone that this girl is his “7usto” as they say.. Nowadays the first thing the girl wants to do is to go out with him in public so she would make sure that the relationship is serious and he wont “yi7li2ilha” and the guy tries to do the opposite so no one would start asking him about the relationship and how serious they are or when is he going to make the next move…  

Akher zaman walla..   

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A Shame

I was taking a nap yesterday when my mom came back home crying.. She was out with her friends and when she came back she was in a very bad shape..  I asked her what was wrong and she kept crying and crying.. after getting her some water and Panadol she calmed down a little.. 

When I asked her again what was wrong she told me that she does not want to tell me so not to hurt me..

I was like “what the hell!!!” 

When I finally got her to talk she told me that she was out with her friends and they were talking about marriage and stuff (of course) when mom told them a funny story about my youngest sister who is barely 14 and a bit chubby.. my mom was teasing her about her weight and telling her that she would look much prettier if she lost some weight.. my sister laughed and told her well she was  getting married and leaving the house the minute she reaches 20…  

So my mom commented on the story and said” I cant believe this chubby fas3ooneh imzabta 7alha min halla2″.. this is when one of her friends said “well you already have the tall good looking thin one and it did not do her any good.. she is 28 and still not married “!!!! 

What the ….!!! 

Honestly I did not care about what that lady said, but what heart me more is that I became something people can use when they want to hurt my mom.. as if I am a shame to the family and people can use that against them..  

I never would have cared about that stupid lady if my mom didn’t.. it really does not bother me that much.. I am happy with my life and believe that everything is naseeb.. and if the right guy who will appreciate me and make me happy does not come , then no harm..  

But apparently me being 28 and not married is becoming a burden on my mom and a shame that people can use against her!!   

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The pressure to get married

Since I was 17 and definitely the fact that I am half Syrian, khattabeen started calling us almost daily.. every time I attend a wedding or visit a friend, mothers start asking about me and taking our house’s number… my mom of course never refused anyone even if they were not suitable or compatible, and that drove me crazy.. I swear sometimes she used to invited 3 different people on the same day.. each with an hour difference.. I felt like kees batata for sale.. we used to put one in the outer living room, the other in the guests room and me running between both rooms, and then one leaves and the third arrives!!!! It felt like Antonio Banderas’s movie Two Much..  

Im sure you can imagine the fights that used to happen.. she knowing that I am refusing for the sake of my BF’s and me insisting that I do not want to get married.. maybe I was doing it for his sake, but even many years after, I do not regret rejecting any of the guys who came to our house, and I do not regret living my life and not marrying young..  

I was so ashamed from the number of people who came to our houseand what my mom did to me I never talked about it.. I always told my friends that I was busy in a family matter.. but of course my mom was so proud that her daughter is getting all these 3ursan she would have announced it in the newspapers if she could..  

I got them all, the short, the tall, the fat, the skinny, and the ugly.. I think they were more than 60 I lost count and names!!!!  

Since I did not get married despite all the 3ursan, my mom believed that I was cursed and started taking me to shyookh to read me Quran and iyfuko il si7er!!!  

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Singleton

The other day I was with my best friends (since high school) watching the movie of the wedding of one of them… One of my friends commented on a girl that appeared on the screen, lets say her name is Rana, “7aram Rana, I think she needs to get married” Another friend asked “Why?” She replied “well she is turning 30 now and she is still not married.. 7aram”

A moment of silence, then my other friend tried to shut her up by saying “what are you saying? Marriage in not everything.. And 30 is not that old..” she realized what she said and tried to make up for it.. I told her to stop trying, what’s said is said.. and then she started acting crazy and saying “well I am not trying anything, and yes even when you turn 30 not married I am going to say 7aram”…. This is my friend for 20 years…

 7aram!!! When did people start pitying us?! Is it really 7aram?.. I mean of course sometimes I miss being with someone especially when we all go out and I am the only one who needs one of her couple friends to pick her up for her not to go alone, but I do love my freedom… I do not have responsibilities, I do not have someone who I have to fix my schedule according to his, I can travel whenever I feel like it, stay home wearing my PJs doing nothing whenever I feel like it.. I can work late, party late and do whatever I feel like doing… il 7amdilla I am satisfied with my life..  7aram… I still cant believe this is how she feels… 

I wonder, am I really missing that big of a deal? Is marriage that great and being single is that bad?!   

Is this the only purpose and aim in life? Getting married?

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